Friday, June 15, 2018

Things Students Say Year 3

Well that's it: the end of year one of official teaching. I can say I've survived a year in the classroom.

*Self high five*

You hear very different things from the Middle School than senior school, and I wasn't always as good at recording them down. But here are some of my highlights:


August 18 (Eavesdropping on Grade 6 students on the way to the library)
Student A - Now that we're in middle school we can read the older books!
Student B - I know! I used to sneak them when Ms. A wasn't looking last year.

Sept 4 (Grade 6 student about the Secret Garden)
"Yay! I am reading an old Englished old book!"

Sept 13 (Gr 6. While working on a formative cartoon on mythology on their own...)
Student A: "Student B says frog legs taste like chicken."
Student B: "This is true! Frog back legs."
(Me: why is this related to the task?).

Sept 13 (Gr 6. Chairs and desks move above our class).
Students: "Earthquake!"
And: "North Korea's attacking!"
One student: "If there was a war you'd already be dead."
How we seem to jump to conclusions...

Sept 14 (Gr 6)
Student: "Do you have a boyfriend?"
Me: "Secret. If I did what kind of boyfriend would I have?"
Student: "A handsome one."
Me: "Oh Ye--"
Student: "Like Justin Bieber."
*face palm*

Nov 20 (Gr 6, Written)
"Bandits usually look like... Big muscular body, grumpy faces, and a huge bag like Santa Claus's, to put things inside that they steal."

Feb 20th (Gr 6)
Student: "I don't like you very much when we have assessments."
Me: "Glad to know your affection is so deep."

Mar 12th (G6)
Student: "Ms. B, who else is coming on the trip next month?"
Me: "Humans."
Student: "No really? I thought we invited cows."

March 13th (G7)
Student looks at me intensely then: "I've seen your top before! At... Christmas."
Me: "Yep, I did wear this at Christmas. Great memory."

Mar (G6)
Student: "You have a good face Ms. B. It's like a stone."

All the time:
Multiple Students: "Ms........ B...riard."
Me: "I've taught you for how long and you still can't remember my name?"

Mar 14th (G7s)
Giant group of grade 7s comes into my classroom at the end of the day and pile up on the rug and bean bags in my room (10-15. I teach 2-3 and 3-4 are in my homeroom and the rest I don't teach at all).
Me: "What are you all doing in here?"
Students are silent for a beat.
Student A: "Uhhh... Ms. B we love you."
Student B: "You're so pretty."
More chorus responses.
Self-esteem boost check?

April 4th (G6)
Student: "Your neck looks like a giraffe."
Me: "Thanks...?"

April 6th (G6)
"Happy Birthday--you look tired."
Compliments at their finest.

April 25th (G6)
"We say that you're salty, but really you're sharp."
"Even if I think the grade is salty, when I read through the comments I think you're exactly right."

May 14th (G6)
"The other grade sixes think you're scary or pretty."
"One or the other? Not together?"

(same student as above, a little later in the conversation)
"No one can read your emotions."

May 22nd (G6)
Student A: "Ms. B, what does the K in your name stand for?"
Me: "Secret."
Student A: "No seriously."
Student B: "Is it Kelly?"
Me: "Do I look like a Kelly?"
Student A: "No. Is it Kendall? or Kay? Like just the letter?"
Me: "Do I look like a Kendall? or Kay? I could dig it."
Students: "Nooooo."

May 28th (G6 news article)
As a teacher, you have to build up your reputation somehow...
"Ms. Briard is the saltiest teacher."

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